By Priya Tronsgard
Priya Tronsgard, Vancouver Mom of 2, Founder of Neurodivergent Affirming Tutoring Agency, Edify Learning Spaces, and Author of Upcoming Audiobook, “Radically Reframe: Three Guiding Principles for A Happier Neurodivergent Family.”
There are many things that go through our heads when find out our child is diagnosed and is Neurodivergent. Whether it’s ASD, ADHD, ODD, Dyslexia, or DCD, there are things that experts don’t tell you that can help you & your family immensely.
1. Let Go of Expectations
When you found out your child was neurodivergent, did your thoughts of the future change? Maybe it did, and that’s OK. However, to quickly get into the best position for your child, let go of your expectations. Expectations rob us from joy by taking our focus away from the present and into an expected future – a future that is rigid. We need to stay flexible and curious! When you’re free of your expectations, you can find new experiences filled with more moments of happiness.
2. Reframe the Pathology
It’s a radical idea! There is so much negativity that surrounds neurodivergent diagnoses, but it doesn’t need to be this way. For example, you might feel concerned that your child is “obsessed” with trains. Reframe and focus on the positives. Instead of thinking about it as pathology – they are “obsessed” – consider that this hyper-focus can quickly make them an expert! Experts are highly valued for their knowledge and experiences.
3. See Behaviour as a Way to Communicate Feelings
Many of us get caught up in expert reports on how many words our child should speak or what behaviours they should have mastered. When they don’t meet these markers, we may feel they – or we – are failing. Remember that our child’s behaviour is also a communication tool! Their body language lets us know they are not feeling safe, heard, respected, and are frustrated, angry, bored, tired or just not feeling it. It’s OK to physically express all of the different feelings, and we can create safe spaces for them to do this. By recognizing our child’s behaviour as communication, we can learn about and help them through their feelings.
The diagnosis is just a tool to help guide you on what to strengthen. The assessments are just one tool, there are others, for example, taking guidance from Autistic parents to see what works best. You can use this to highlight support and to find the best opportunities. Life can be so enjoyable if you celebrate small and unique wins with your children and family and see where life’s road takes you!
About The Author
Priya Tronsgard is the founder of Edify Learning Spaces, a one-on-one online tutoring agency based in Vancouver, Canada. She is also the former director of a childcare facility in Vancouver. Priya’s experience in the field of education and working with students from the ages of 3–99 has taught her how people of all ages and abilities learn best. Priya’s two children are also supported to thrive with their differences in learning styles.
Priya grew up in Vancouver, Canada and was raised by a single father after her mother passed away when she was 12. Her father, young brother who was 7, and Priya learned to thrive through the chaos of it all.
Find more at : https://www.edifylearningspaces.com/ . Instagram: @edifylearningspaces
Stay Tuned for Soon-To-Be Released Audio Book on Amazon.
“Radically Reframe: Three Guiding Principles for a Happier Neurodivergent Family.”
